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My friends made me promise to blog about this Cavs opening night victory after getting home from the bar, so here it goes.

Let me tell you something. If Lebron James is gonna start goin’ 6 for 7 from 3-point land, just give him the MVP award right now. Just give it to him. End of story.

Second thing. I know this was the New Orleans Hornets, and I know it was the first game of the year, but I have never seen a Cleveland team this dominant since the 1995 Indians. Never. In 1995, you just knew the Tribe would go out and pummel an inferior team. This Cavs team is almost unfair, and it’s just scratching the surface. You’re tellin’ me that Larry Hughes is gonna score 10 points? Ilgauskas is gonna score 12? And the Cavs are gonna win by more than 20? And that’s the first game of the season? Get outta here…..just get outta my face.

This is nuts. Absolutely nuts.

Damn. They’re going to be good.

I just spent a couple hours watching LeBron put on one of the craziest shooting displays you’ll ever see. Watching Larry Hughes collect six assists, one on a smooth first-quarter alley oop to LBJ. Watching Z score eight quick points in the first quarter while pulling down seven boards. Watching Donyell Marshall and Damon Jones, two of the team’s “secondary” signings following the Hughes acquisition, score 30 combined points, hit 5 threes and add 12 rebounds (9 by Marshall).

And I’m stumped.

For the past few weeks, I’ve been watching and listening to a bunch of NBA know-it-alls contend that the Cavaliers would have a very good yearbut would still finish fourth in the East, behind Miami, Detroit and Indiana. In the weeks leading up to start of the season, I really started wondering if I was missing something. Zydrunas Ilgauskas, Eric Snow, Damon Jones, Drew Gooden, Donyell Marshall, Larry Huges.

Alone, that starting five could contend for the final playoff spot in either league. But then you add a 20-year-old kid who looks a hell of a lot like the best all-round player on the planet? I’m sorry, but that team can play with anybody.

Dominant center? Check. (Well, scoring center, anyway.) Tough rebounding? Z, Gooden and Marshall had 7, 8 and 9 rebounds, respectively. Inside scoring? Pick your poison. Outside? How many threes tonight? Thirteen. In 21 attempts. That’s 62%. Defense? Well…that’s one of the reasons Mike Brown’s here, and the D looked better tonight. At the very least, this team’s going to create turnovers and a ton of fastbreak points.

Best player in the game? I think we’ve got that too.

So, someone please tell me why this team can’t at least be as good as Indiana. I’ve heard that it’ll take them a while to develop some team chemistry. I almost had some high school Bunsen Burner flashbacks watching these guys play together tonight. And name one player on the Pacers, or even the Pistons, that can take over a game the way LeBron can.

Ron Artest? He’s a beast, and a bit insane, but he can’t make as many things happen on the offensive side of the court to make him the dominant end-game player that LeBron can be. The reason: When James has the ball in his hands, he can beat you off the dribble, passing it, or shooting it. Artest usually needs someone to get him the ball to make something happen. That’s a big difference, I don’t care what kind of defensive freak you are.

Richard Hamilton? Not nearly physical enough and doesn’t do much else but score.

Chauncey Billups? He’s definitely the closest of this trio, with his ability to score, pass and shoot, but he doesn’t quite stack up to LBJ because he’s not a big rebounder.

The Heat, of course, have Shaq and Wade, and while I’d rather have LeBron than anyone else in the league right now (considering factors like age and health), Miami is deservedly the favorite in the East.

The Cavaliers, meanwhile, appear to have everything, including a deep roster. It may be too much to overcome the Pistons this year, but the Cavs will finish the season ahead of the Pacers . I know, it’s only one game. Trust me, I’m not calling for a Finals run just yet. But it could happen soon. Real soon. As for this year? I’m thinking 55-plus wins, a couple All Stars, miles of highlight-reel footage, and maybe even an MVP award.

Oh, and the #3 seed in the East.

So here’s how I watched most Cavs games last year…at a bar, with my friend Larry. Tonight I’ll be hitting the Cool Cleveland party at Pickwick & Frolick ahead of the game, no Larry tonight, might watch the game there, might have to go down the street (how the hell am I gonna find a place to park…) No sound for a game at a bar, usually, which was very good last year as Mark Price was terrible, didn’t need to hear a word he had to say. We came up with a set of rules for watching the Cavs.

RULE #1 – You must never turn your eyes away from the screen while Lebron James is on the floor. To do so is to risk missing the most incredible play you have ever seen in your entire life. This happens almost every game. Larry turns his head away from the screen too often, and then I end up having to describe to him how Lebron did this, Lebron did that, my god, I can’t believe it….just watch the TV, ok? Never avert your eyes.

RULE #2 – Whenever Desagana Diop came into the game, we yelled “YOPP!” And every time he was visible on screen, another yell of “YOPP!” He’s gone now, so I have no idea what I’m gonna do with this rule, not sure which player on the roster this year has a name which will lend itself well to yelling loudly in a bar.

RULE #3 – Always order another drink in the 4th quarter, especially if the Cavs are down a few points. Show a little confidence.

RULE #4 – Most important rule. Never, EVER violate Rule #1.